Recently Thursdays are a strangely contemplative for me. At least for about 10 minutes. On Thursdays I pick Soren up early from school to take him to Feeding Therapy. After we get home, we walk to school to pick up Moira. This is where I get contemplative.
Soren turned 5 this year. The year of kindergarten. If Soren was a typical kid, he would be going to kindergarten at Moira's school. Lots of my fellow moms have daughters Soren's age that are now attending kindergarten in these classes. I've seen them grow up through the years, but never really compared them to Soren.
But now when Soren and I go to pick up Moira, I see these lovely girls running about. I see that they look at Soren slightly confused. And I think of how it should have been. When Soren and I came to pick up Moira, those girls should have been delighted to see their friend Soren. I'm sure some of them would already have crushes on him because he's quite a handsome fellow. He might play with them happily. Or he might be shy, not wanting to hang around with the girls. Or he might have his own group of buddies to run around and be boyish with.
So I get a little sad. I think of what could have--should have--been. Then Moira shows up, we head home, and I forget about it all. Mostly. Until the next Thursday.