Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Shorn Soren

Soren has always had a good head of hair.  And like many a kid, cutting Soren's hair has led to some challenges.  When he was little, I took him to children's hair salons.  But Soren didn't sit up on his own, so I would have to sit in the chair with him to hold his head up.  This led to us both getting rather hair.

Later, I took him to Supercuts or Fantastic Sam's.  The ladies there were very kind and would just cut his hair while Soren was in his wheelchair.  But they always seemed a little nervous around Soren.  It tended to be a stressful appointment for all involved--especially me.

So then I bought a pair of clippers.  I figured I'd save money and the hairdressers wouldn't look at me with pity.   I chose the #2 setting for the clippers and went to town.  But the clippers were noisy, so Soren wasn't very happy with this situation.  Which led to me not being very happy about this situation.  So then Soren starting going for long periods between haircuts.  Thus, his thick head of hair only got thicker.

During his haircuts, Soren would insist on putting his hands on his face, which got hair on his face.  He would move his head this way and that flinging himself about to try and avoid me.  The fact that I actually cut most of his hair and didn't take off an ear is a miracle.

Another problem was that after the haircut, there had to be a shower.  Talk about adding insult to injury.  First the buzzing and the hair.  Then the water.  What kind of torture was this?  But despite all the cussing and frustration, Soren was always happier once his hair was cut.

This went on for years until this past Halloween.  Soren was dressing up as Ferris Bueller.  It had been a bit since I'd cut his hair because I wanted it longer for Ferris.  But knew I couldn't actually cut it in a "style."  #2 clippers was my only skill level.  I did a Mohawk on him the year he was Puck from Glee and nearly botched that up.  So how was I going to get him to look like Matthew Broderick's Ferris?

Enter Randy Madden, hairdresser.  Randy had been cutting Moira's hair for at least a year at the same salon that I go to.  Moira loves him.  Randy is the coolest dude you'd ever want to meet.  He dresses like a rocker.  I think because he actually is a rock musician.  Moira hangs out with him and gives him crap the entire hour she's with him.  Seriously.  I've never heard a 14 year old give a grown man so much crap.  She tells him he posts too many pictures on Instagram.  She tells him he uses too many hashtags.  She basically schools him on how to be a better guy.  And he loves every second of it.

On days when I go to get my hair cut and colored without the kids, I've observed Randy cutting other kids' hair besides Mo.  Little kids.  Kids that, unlike Mo, wiggle around and really don't want their hair cut.  I figured if Randy could handle these kids, he could handle Soren.  So, for Soren's Ferris Bueller Halloween haircut, I went to Randy.  And, good gravy, I was the nervous Mother Hen hovering right by them the whole time thinking that Soren was going to give Randy hell the way Soren gives me hell.

But this amazing thing happened.  Randy, being the super mellow dude he is, wasn't fazed by Soren at all.  And Soren was completely on his best behavior with Randy.  It was like, "I'm hanging with this cool guy, Mom.  Back off!"  Plus, Randy has the quietest clippers ever, which really helped!  But Randy totally worked with Soren's wiggling this way and that and just talked Soren through the entire thing.  It was awesome.

So, I have packed up my clippers and now the kids get back-to-back appointments with Randy.  It's one less thing I have to do.  And totally worth every penny!